THE JU: Somewhat Disturbing

Last week for me was what we theatre folk know and hate as "Hell Week" A week of endless rehearsals and tech work all leading up to opening weekend of a show. It causes more breakouts, breakdowns, and arguments in one week than I have ever seen any one activity cause besides addiction.
But that's not what disturbs me. the other day i heard someone say something that snapped a lot of things back into focus, a fellow cast member commented about the play:

"I just don't care anymore...because when you don't care you can't get hurt."

Now that's not a foreign philosophy to me or anybody for that matter. But i don't think that i've ever heard anyone say that out loud without being in the middle of a breakdown.

It's definately true. if you don't care about making the team it doesn't hurt when your name isn't on the list, if you never knew a person you might be sad that they passed away but it wouldn't truly hurt you.

But that is no way to live. If you don't care about anything you may not get hurt but how will you ever know joy? If you don't care about anything what's to stop you from hurting other people, or wasting away in your parents basement when your friends are out in the world making something of themselves?

We all have our reasons for "not caring"
not letting the backstabbing best friend see that she actually got to you
supporting the girl that got the part you wanted
saving face if the show you're starring in isn't as good as you thought it would be
not letting the ex boyfriend see that you still care for him

Those are all things we hid because they'd make us victims, they'd make us vulnerable. And we can't stand that because it shows people how to hurt you in the future.
But being vulnerable is human, and if you never let anyone see that humanity how can anyone ever truly love you?

So ask yourself, is being invincible worth being alone?