Feeling a little confused

I suppose everyone has this sort of moment in life where they really wonder what life has in store for them. I've been thinking about this a lot lately, concerning everything. All of these questions are buzzing through my head? What will happen after college? Where will I live? Will I get my own place? Will I have to move back in with the parental units? Will I be given the chance to build my resume? Will I be shot down my every audition I go on? Will I end ever meet a guy? Will I ever meet the RIGHT guy? Will I be single forever? Will I be one of those people that hoards animals to fill the gaps in her life and feel like I'm not a lonely pathetic loser? Will I have a happy life and skip all of this negative shit? I hate thinking about this! But I can't help it! I'm loving college, I'm feeling quite accomplished, like I'm doing what I was meant to be doing. But what happens when it's all over? I can't be in college forever, I want to start my life, but I'm also terrified. I don't know what I will do exactly and I can't stand not knowing.On a lighter note, I'm gonna' start doing Roller Derby. They're starting a league here in Ellensburg, and since I didn't get into "Urinetown" at school, I need something to do. I was pretty pumped when I found out they were starting it, especially since I had just watched "Whip It" before I saw the flyer. I'm ready to pwn some bitches, and I think it's gonna' be just the fun I need in my life currently.

EM: Lactose free milk

So today I saw that my roomie bought milk. I was particularly psyched because I was having a PBJ for lunch (with Adam's Peanutbutter, the best thing EVER) and nothing, imo, goes better with that than milk. As I poured I realized that what I was pouring myself was a empty glass of disappointment and resentment. The carton read "Lucerne 100% Lactose Free!"

What is Lactose? Hmmmm... let's see... I believe IT'S THAT THING THAT'S IN ALL DAIRY along with FAT!

Stop screwing with my foods and stopping trying to make me healthier! I reserve the right to kill myself slowly with fatty foods if I fucking want to! And STOP taking the trans fat out of my Dick's Fries too! I mean COME ON! If someone hoenstly needs you to "hold their hand" as Ju would say, through life and they can't drive by the fast food joint themselves without getting food there, they deserve to keep eating themselves into oblivion like an idiot anyways.

Stop it! STOP NOW!

My roomie will RUE the say she put Lucerne in MY HOUSE

EM: Omg, life is... ugh

Okay, I'm not gonna' bitch, because, let's face it, I don't have all that much to bitch about. But COME ON! People need to cut me some freakin' slack. So I'm directing a one act this quarter for school, and it's the first thing I've done in the Theatre department since I've gotten to CWU. I'm so excited! I love my script and I'm so excited to bring it to life! Just a little problem... no one seems to want to let me just do my job...

Alright, I admit it, I probably have the least experience out of everyone in this whole production! Okay, I know! I'm aware! But that doesn't give anyone the right to tell me how to do my job! Actors........... OH MY GOD ACTORS! DON'T TELL ME HOW TO DIRECT! I don't care what you think, I don't care if you like how I do it, I.... DO.... NOT.... CARE. If you don't like how I do it, give me a bad review at the end of it. I don't care. Then you'll never have to work with me again. But don't give me tips, or tell me what to do, just fucking act. If I want you to do it a certain may, I'll tell you to do it a certain way, you don't get to explore yourself and your character if I don't like where it's going! OK?! SO SORRY I'M PARTICULAR ABOUT WHAT I LIKE!

Okay, not all of my actors are doing this, actually most aren't. But there are one or two people that I want to slap and just... I don't even know... put a shock collar on them and zap them until they get it right! I'm a good director! I think I'm a pretty nice person! But when people do shit like this I turn into a GIANT BITCH. A GIANT RAVING MAD BITCH.

Don't make me turn into crazy bitch again please people!